before i realized what mistakes really could be made, before i realized how quickly addiction ruins lives, before i realized the power of healing, all i knew was good and refreshing and sparkles. everyday i wore sparkles, around my eyes, in my hair, a band of sparkles across my blond hair was a common feature but than things in life got dark, and caring about sparkles was the least of my worries. my worry instead was just to survive, to make it through, to redeem.
we are moving (again), this time into our own home, a home we own, a home we will make a new life, new family, new truths in. and with moving, comes packing, and today under a pile, i found that silver sparkly headband i wore with such resilience for so many years. and i thought back to when i started wearing it, how happy and good and resfreshing life was, than i thought about the dark time i went through, (though i only ever allow myself a brief moment to remember that time "it is finished - you are outdoing the punishment" ) and i thought of how different my life is now.
and i am leaving for work now, in a happy and good and refreshing life, almost 3 years later...and i have a silver sparkly band in my dark hair.
love the leave.